During a recent speaking engagement on becoming a Daughter of the King one of my bullet points was on Attention Seeking.
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self his being renewed day by day. – 2Corinthians 4:16
It reminds us in the bible that our beauty will fade.. it also reminds us that in the last days “people will be lovers of themselves.”
Inner beauty is inside each of us. We are all beautiful in God’s eyes as we are created in the image of God. God doesn’t make junk. However, many people don’t feel beautiful inside. We are often smothered by a lack of confidence and even a lack of acceptance of other people. This usually comes from comparing ourselves to those around us. Childhood hurts and “taunts” of classmates about our weight, height, teeth, hair (insert any physical attribute here) often form a root of rejection that follows us into adulthood. It is easy to compare ourselves to others especially when we compare our outward appearance. And, the outward appearance is the one often easiest to fix – and that gains us the most “confirmation”. It’s easy to dye our hair, get braces, lose weight, gain weight, work out.. but what about living a holy life? One that makes your light shine from the inside out? What about being a humble servant who walks in a holy boldness and confidence? Not as easy to fix.. but so worth it!
I see so many women, and even men, who are beautiful inside and out – but they focus so much on the out. New selfies every other day, cleavage shots, muscle shots in the mirror, all cleverly disguised as an “update”…. I call it “Attention Seeking” and it makes me sad. Sometimes? Even angry. Angry because I know it’s a ploy of the enemy to get their focus off God. Angry because I’ve seen it lead to indiscretion becoming more concerned about how many “likes” and “Comments” received by others vs. confirmation from God that they will one day hear “Well done my good and faithful servant.”
It’s a natural human desire to receive confirmation. Especially for those who never received it properly growing up. But the attention we should be seeking? Is from God. Asking Him to use us to be a better wife, husband, mother, father or friend. To reach the lost and hurting. You see, when you look inward? It slowly leads to depression and anxiety. It’s proven spiritually and scientifically. The “What about me” syndrome leads to a life that is a roller coaster. Happy when in the spotlight, depressed when not. When you seek the attention and confirmation of man? Something will happen. You’ll get older. You’ll look in the mirror and there will be wrinkles. You’ll not be able to score the winning touch down or win the local beauty pageant. And you’ll get depressed. You’ll live in “I used to” land instead of embracing the here and now and living in peace and joy.
I’m not speaking from a place of condemnation – I’m speaking from a heart of love. One that was once broken into a million pieces because I was once attention seeking. Seeking attention of man for a job well done at work when my personal life was falling apart. When I felt not pretty enough. Now? While I try to look acceptable when I face the world – because I believe we should look our best – I don’t do it to gain attention, but just to let the outside mirror the inside. I do it to make my husband smile when he looks my way.
Girl – let your light shine from the inside out! Walk with a holy boldness and confidence because you are a daughter of the King! Not because you got 200 “likes” on your last selfie!